Due to South-Asian values taught by my upbringing, wearing my heart on my sleeve is something I never truly learned, nor figure out how it was so easy for people to do. Deep in my heart was the ingrained fear that by doing so I would look weak to society. Almost as if that vulnerability would have a looming sign over my head exposing me to the world, “look I am weak and in need of help!”. I spent most of my life shoving my emotions in the back of my mind so that no one saw that the happy, and lively Misha was truly breaking. In my last year as an undergraduate, I realized this aggressive and relentless need to “stay strong” was simply making me weaker, and it was time to finally ask for help. 

 

In order to escape the constructs of hopelessness, and trauma I did not need to push myself to the point of breaking, rather, with a cup of warm coffee I needed to listen to the experiences of others, which was only possible if I asked. While it felt incredibly uncomfortable at first I learned to finally talk to those around me, read books with the representation of those who grew up with the same ethnic beliefs, and practice deep emotional vulnerability. These difficult conversations and lessons helped me to finally express myself when I wasn’t feeling well, take rests, and even cry in front of my friends and family (you may just catch me at a The Wellness Collective event crying my eyes out).

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During this journey, I remember finding solace and peace in building a balance of incorporating physical activity into mental well-being practices. So many hours were spent alone in the gym with treadmills, barbells, and dumbbells (a lot of pre-workout too…) hoping that there were other like-individuals I could share my passion for fitness and mental well-being so we all could start becoming “swole” mentally and physically together. I realized that, this did not have to stay a day-dream I imagined on my solo “hot-girl” walks, and that I truly have the ability to create this community of like minded individuals to empower themselves through both the context of physical and mental health. 

 

This organization is my baby which I have created in the darkest of hours, in hopes that one day it will become someone's light. I want every person who takes part in the events or resources provided by The Wellness Collective to know that above all they are worthy to empower themselves in all aspects of life and that they have like community members who are open to sharing their experiences and values… we just have to seek them out and ask. 

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All of you guys (yes, even all the ones older and/or taller than me) are like lotus flowers to me. As my therapist once called me “a lotus flower which beautifies its surroundings, despite growing in the harshest of conditions” (thank you Mieke for everything, and for always empowering me to use all the pain for the better).

~Misha Shahid (Founder/President)